| see, it's all very logical |
[13 Jan 2007|04:13pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
a song to pass the time |
] |
Everything's been such a blur. I guess it gets pretty fucking old when whereever I go, someone else wants to fuck with me. Its either you want revenge, or you arent satisfied, or you're hopelessly devoted, or you're simply fucking bored. I'm tired of certain shady people. They arent worth my time, my breath or my thought even. Why the fuck is there so much conflict and hidden emotion when we're all going to the same place in the end? Drama. it's funny really, life's a big fucking joke and you're completely blind to it. Ignorance is bliss though, isn't it? laugh it off. One night, one person, one minute, can take you away from everything else and make you smile. One person can say the slightest thing, and it makes you wonder what they were thinking for days and days. One person can make you realize that one person is all you need.
|
|
| no more bullshit |
[11 Jan 2007|09:29pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 depressed |
] |
I'm not a poet. I'm a shitty writer. I'll never amount to anything =]
|
|
| seasons greetings or something of the sort |
[25 Dec 2006|09:40pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
bob dylan- cocaine |
] |
what a lovely morning its been!! Michelle and I got going away presents because they're kicken us out of the house soon heh. TAO is coming right up! My parents wanted to go see paul van dyke but I talked them out of spending their new years at a rave.. hehe. I cannot wait to see what goes on the rest of the day. but if you're down to have a craft session tomorow.. call me (if you know the #) cause I'm going to get fabric for my sewing machine.
nothing important to say
not that anything ever is..
Merry-whatever-you-celebrate
|
|
| take me and break me |
[14 Dec 2006|04:50pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
armor for sleep |
] |
=] I know where I need to be
I know what I deserve
I know who I Want to be with
I know who I love
and I know my purpose.
to love and be loved
its funny...I feel like I just woke up.
"so take me and break me. make me strong liek you. I'll be forever grateful to this and you. its only you, beautiful, and I dont want anyone if I can choose, its only you."-Brand New
|
|
| nothin but sunshine |
[13 Dec 2006|06:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
hopeless |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
atmosphere |
] |
And the man who thought it had been over a long time ago
He sits close to the glow of the television
The commercial’s singing, “Live your life”
He stares, choking on realization
At the family on the screen
Making eye contact with
Actors cleverly disguised to fit
This close knit persona that we aim for
Intertwined in lost energy
He holds his tongue
Swallows the medicine
He’s quiet again
alone and piss drunk in the living room
|
|
| lets sail away |
[11 Dec 2006|06:03am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 giddy |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
BRIGHT EYES |
] |
Amazing (AMAZING) weekend.
so lets lay around
& sit on our asses
pretending the world isn't clawing at our backs
or putting weight on our shoulders
like we've got nowhere to go
no one to see.
nothing to do.
lets just lay here
& lets sail away =]
|
|
| keep the blood in your head & feet on the ground |
[07 Dec 2006|12:37am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
delirious |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
brand new- 70 X 7 |
] |
I've been watching the world go by passively. My nights are pretty lonely, leaving me to think and ponder and write, until I come up with something I'm proud of. All these diferent emotions, good and bad, have been rising up from the back of my mind. The more I think about running far far away, the more appealing it sounds. I guess seeing those same buildings, same people and same god damn streets is getting too depressing. or maybe it's just highschool.
Here's my writing on blast...
Desire is hanging over us like mist
In the morning when you don’t matter
Our shallow hearts are beating fast
And you have no idea what goes on
Behind these milky pupils that gaze into your yellow eyes
Behind that innocent smile you claimed you could take away
So easily
And now I’m sitting on the porch
Like I’ve got nothing on my mind
Hoping I’ll get drunk enough
To make myself blind tonight
To crouch down over windows and sinks
And feel the tile cold against my ears
When I’m sobbing on the bathroom floor
Shaking without self control
Or any train of thought at all
Besides the words you made so clear that day
“Maybe it’s not meant to be”
An ongoing repetition of my regret,
Now I’m walking towards the porch again
Hoping I’ll have enough cigarettes to
Chain-smoke your nights away
His hands are in my pockets now
But he only calls me baby when he’s drunk
And I’m finding it funny how easily I’ve forgotten
All the words you said to me that day
How easily the poetry on my tongue is pacified
And stored away
Behind that innocent smile I claimed I’d keep forever
|
|
| bittersweet |
[04 Dec 2006|04:54am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
euphoric |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
bright eyes, of course |
] |
I've had such an amazing weekend. it's exactly what I needed after this rather lonely week. I am grateful for the lucid dreams, teary moments, bright lights, dancing, serene mornings,and the beautiful friendships I've made these past two years in the rave scene and out.
My heart is in woodley park, and mark's car, and on the dance floor!!
=]<3 haligh, haligh, an awful lie.
my partners in crime <3
peekaboo!
|
|
| out of touch// |
[27 Nov 2006|12:01am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 amused |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
hurricane - bob dylan |
] |
dodging turbulence. hanging from a tiny tiny string that's bound to split any minute. They say fear stands for fuck everything and run, right about now I want to run as far as I can and fuck everything in my way. everything is a chain reaction, every action has a trend. Our wedding day is around the corner. The nights get late and my clock is wrong on purpose. Here goes nothing, my friend!!
letting go
feeling free
reaching out
dressing up
fly away
|
|
| fuckk I havent written in forever |
[18 Nov 2006|09:54am] |
been doing the same shit... parties on the weekend.. kicken it in my south bay...got back from san fran two weeks ago and I got my boy back =] (AMAZING)
so
speak slow, tell me, love where do we go?
|
|
|
[06 Nov 2006|01:46pm] |
|
hollerrrr
im in SF.
|
|
| cooterina cigarella |
[30 Sep 2006|08:18am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 relaxed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
dream to me - dj hixxy |
] |
Last night was pretty lovely in its own way, sat around with my dsp family sippen a little somethin somethin. haha. and I just got home, its 8:21 in the morning so I thought I'd write an entry before I go back to bed. Groovy is tonight, so hit me up if you know the number.
I've also noticed that all my moods on my livejournal are the same.. accomplished, anxious, empty, loved, lost, excited, content.. why is my life so one track?! ;-]
take care everyone!
|
|
| I'll go home, where two plus two = five |
[28 Sep 2006|07:38pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 contemplative |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
tegan and sara - not tonight |
] |
"Ohh rubbish! which would you sooner sleep with, me or a skeleton? Dont you enjoy being alive? Dont you like feeling? This is me, this is my hand, this is my leg, I'm real, I'm solid! don't you like this?"
"Yes, I like that," he said.
|
|
| finally feeling inspired |
[25 Sep 2006|07:54pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
accomplished |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
waste of paint - bright eyes |
] |
ohh as the days go by, I keep telling myself that THIS WILL HAPPEN and this year is going to be AMAZING and I remind myself of how much I love autumn. I've been waiting all summer for the skies to darken and the leaves to fall and suddenly its allllll here and it's GREAT. I mean here I am, finally achieving all this impossible shit and I guess before I was too proud to admit that I could amount to anything. If that even makes sense. Hmm well I'm looking forward to a lot of things. The parental unit just let me know that they TRUST ME enough to take a plane to San Fransisco for 3 or 4 days to sleep in a dorm with my cousin and just explore. damn that's exciting, I haven't been to that city in forever! and if I keep this up, I'm going to massive in Arizona in november. Today Me and Pookie sat on the curb next to hawthorne where all the cars were speeding by and he got scared but I mean it was crazy, all the colours splashing around behind us. I think it was a nice goodnight kiss.
Alright, my next party might be GROOVY if I don't go to Dre's bash. so hit me up if you're goingg. un beso, ciau.
|
|
| can't open my eyes |
[24 Sep 2006|09:13am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
empty |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
bright eyes |
] |
I havent been able to open my eyes lately. I just crawled into the shower and came out, even more tired. I don't know what's wrong but I think it has something to do with me emotionally. it's like looking in the mirror is a giant wake up call and I wanna stay in my fucked-up little world forever and ever. Tomorow is school, finally I can feel like a lab mouse again. Wake up, school work, school work, school work, socialize, school work, school work, eat, school work.
|
|
| lately I've been wishing I had one desire |
[11 Sep 2006|08:28pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
IN LOVE |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
perfect sonnet- bright eyes |
] |
something that would make it so that nothing mattered, all would be clear then. I guess I'll have to settle for a few brief moments, and watch it all disolve into a single second.. try to write it down into a perfect sonnet, one foolish line.
I'm going to san fransisco this weekend or next!! PARTY!!!!
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
staringpr0blem's journal
